THE COW ECONOMY

YORUBA ECONOMICS: You have two cows you kill them(YORUBA IS A TRIBE IN NIGERIA}
both, and throw an owambe party!{OWAMBE IS A LAVISH PARTY}.

IBO ECONOMICS: You have two cows, you make very good(IBO IS A TRIBE IN NIGERIA)
counterfeits of them, and sell for the price of the
real cows!

HAUSA ECONOMICS: You have two cows, you rear them till(HAUSA IS A TRIBE IN NIGERIA)
they are four, make sure your kids rear cows too, and
just maintain!

TRADITIONAL ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You sell one
and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies and the economy
grows. You retire on the income.

INDIAN ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You worship them.

PAKISTANI ECONOMICS: You don't have any cows. You
claim that the Indian cows belong to you. You ask the
US for financial aid, China for military aid, British
for Warplanes, Italy for machines, Germany for
technology, French for submarines, Switzerland for
loans, Russia for drugs, Japan for equipment. You buy
the cows with all this and claim exploitation by the
world.

AMERICAN ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You sell one
and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You profess surprise when the cow drops dead. You put
the blame on some nation with cows & naturally that
nation will be a danger to mankind. You wage a war to
save the world and grab the cows.

FRENCH ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You go on strike
because you want three cows.

GERMAN ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You reengineer
them so that they live for 100 years, eat once a month
and milk themselves.

BRITISH ECONOMICS: You have two cows. They are both
mad cows.

ITALIAN ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You don't know
where they are. You break for lunch.

SWISS ECONOMICS: You have 5000 cows, none of which
belong to you. You charge others for storing them.

JAPANESE ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You redesign
them so that they are one-tenth the size of an
ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.. You
then create cute cartoon cow images called Cowkimon
and market them worldwide.

RUSSIAN ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You count them
and learn you have five cows. You count them again and
learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn
you have 17 cows. You give up counting and open
another bottle of vodka.

CHINESE ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You have 300
people milking them. You claim full employment, high
bovine productivity and arrest anyone reporting the
actual numbers.

NIGERIAN ECONOMICS: You have two cows. You eat one and
claim it was stolen. Call in the Police to
investigate. Police arrests everyone living within
100km. Torture them thoroughly until someone admitted
kidnapping the cow. The police instead collected one
cow each from everybody arrested. You have your cow
back and the Police now own a cattle farm.

T’is the night before turkey ...

T’is the night before turkey ...
By John Williams Comments 0
Published: November 25, 2009

It’s the day before Thanksgiving and all through the house,

The cat is whining from its room to be let out.

I stirred from my bed to go open the door,

MultimediaPhotoview all photos Only to tripped by the tabby and fall to the floor.

"It’s Thanksgiving Eve,” I think to myself,

And I dream of the goodies that sit on the shelves.

Pies and cake and stuffing I crave,

But there is work yet to do, so I’m off to go shave.

Yet visions of drumsticks and sliced ham still dance in my head,

And green beans and cranberries and hot buttered bread.

So while my wife is sleeping, to the fridge I do sneak,

Just to open the door to have a quick peek.

But the inside is empty, how can this be?

No tasty morsels, there’s nothing for me.

But deep in the back of the fridge I do see,

A note that my wife has written to me.

"My dear love,” she writes. "I know you can’t wait.

I have hidden the food so put down your plate.

"Your cholesterol concerns me and so does your heart,

So beginning Friday we’ll make a fresh start.

"No cookies or candy or soft drinks for you,

Just apples and oranges and vegetables, too.

"So during tomorrow you can eat all that you wish,

Just make sure to limit it to only one dish.

"We want you around for more years to come,

So we’ll go out walking when you come home.”

A tear forms in my eye as I take in her note,

Underneath this exterior I’m big as a boat.

So come Thursday I’ll be thankful for my life:

Low-fat butter, low-sodium salt, two girls and a wife.